Author: tiki god

Wyvern: Directed by Steven R. Monroe. With Nick Chinlund, Erin Karpluk, Barry Corbin, Elaine Miles. They Find a Live Wyvern in small town Alaska. Set in Alaska, or at least an abandoned movie lot with plenty of Alaskan vacation footage, the film is both a low budget dragon fight and an entertainingly competent made for TV Wyvern experience. I was pleasantly surprised by the quality of the CGI, though the budget shines through when you notice that the CGI Wyvern doesn’t actually physically interact with anything and nearly all of it’s close up set pieces are static shots without much...

Death on the Nile: Directed by Kenneth Branagh. With Michael Rouse, Alaa Safi, Orlando Seale, Charlie Anson. While on vacation on the Nile, Hercule Poirot must investigate the murder of a young heiress. The trailer had me interested, back when I first saw in in the before times, and the cast sealed the deal when I saw exactly who was in it and the types of characters they were playing. I wasn’t familiar with the story before watching it, and while the basic blocks of a murder mystery are there, the pieces are all used in ways that seemed novel...

X-Ray: Directed by Boaz Davidson. With Barbi Benton, Charles Lucia, Jon Van Ness, John Warner Williams. While receiving a routine check-up, a woman finds herself stranded on the hospital’s eighth floor, while someone dressed as a doctor is intent on her never leaving, even if it means killing any staff member who comes into contact with her. A story about a woman with absolutely no agency at all in her life, she’s getting a checkup because her work is making her, she goes to floor 8 because she’s told to, she’s admitted against her will, not told what exactly she’s...

Transformers: Age of Extinction: Directed by Michael Bay. With Mark Wahlberg, Stanley Tucci, Kelsey Grammer, Nicola Peltz. When humanity allies with a bounty hunter in pursuit of Optimus Prime, the Autobots turn to a mechanic and his family for help. The fourth of the films, this one is likely the longest, if only because they filmed an entire film’s worth of material in Hong Kong. It’s actually somewhat more enjoyable than the previous film, nearly completely toning down cheeseball dialogue and plot elements, but there were a few times that I distinctly felt like the CGI wasn’t up to snuff,...

Solo: A Star Wars Story: Directed by Ron Howard. With Alden Ehrenreich, Joonas Suotamo, Woody Harrelson, Emilia Clarke. Board the Millennium Falcon and journey to a galaxy far, far away in an epic action-adventure that will set the course of one of the Star Wars saga’s most unlikely heroes. Watched this after the other two star wars films I watched this week, it’s still a good film that doesn’t exactly stick the landing, but it definitely doesn’t miss the mark by very much. Buy On Amazon!

Celeste & Jesse Forever: Directed by Lee Toland Krieger. With Rashida Jones, Andy Samberg, Ari Graynor, Eric Christian Olsen. A divorcing couple tries to maintain their friendship while they both pursue other people. Gut wrenching and emotional and hilarious and about as real as you can get with the subject matter. Rashida Jones and Andy Samberg are both hilarious people, and they’re both hilarious in this film, but it’s the kind of funny that’s more realistic and sad at the end of the day, instead of the campy goofy humor that they’re known for. Well, Andy at least, Rashida has...

Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back: Directed by Irvin Kershner. With Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Billy Dee Williams. After the Rebels are brutally overpowered by the Empire on the ice planet Hoth, Luke Skywalker begins Jedi training with Yoda, while his friends are pursued across the galaxy by Darth Vader and bounty hunter Boba Fett. Had some horrible news today, so I’m drinkin beers and watching movies that make me feel better. It helps that I’m able to quote like 99% of the lines in Empire. Buy On Amazon!

Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi: Directed by Richard Marquand. With Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Billy Dee Williams. After a daring mission to rescue Han Solo from Jabba the Hutt, the Rebels dispatch to Endor to destroy the second Death Star. Meanwhile, Luke struggles to help Darth Vader back from the dark side without falling into the Emperor’s trap. I had some horrible news tonight, so here’s the second movie that I watched to try to make it more better. It sorta helped. Buy On Amazon!