Author: tiki god

Don’t Open Till Christmas: Directed by Edmund Purdom. With Edmund Purdom, Alan Lake, Belinda Mayne, Mark Jones. Somebody with very little Christmas spirit is killing anyone in a Santa suit one London holiday season, and Scotland Yard has to stop him before he makes his exploits an annual tradition. Low budget and creepy, but there’s a bit of charm in the movie that I love. Buy On Amazon!

Mallrats: Directed by Kevin Smith. With Shannen Doherty, Jeremy London, Jason Lee, Claire Forlani. Both dumped by their girlfriends, two best friends seek refuge in the local mall. I finally own this (again) on disk, but this time it’s a Blu-ray and it came with all sorts of cool stuff, like the extended version of the film. The extended version isn’t better than the theatrical version, in fact I’d say it’s only barely the same movie as the version we all know and love. There’s an extra 30 minutes of set up before they even get to the dang mall!...

Avatar: The Way of Water: Directed by James Cameron. With Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldana, Sigourney Weaver, Stephen Lang. Jake Sully lives with his newfound family formed on the extrasolar moon Pandora. Once a familiar threat returns to finish what was previously started, Jake must work with Neytiri and the army of the Na’vi race to protect their home. I have seen this movie and my initial reactions are that it’s definitely a movie, it’s definitely set in the same universe that the first movie was in, I’m pretty sure these are mostly the same actors, but it doesn’t quite capture...

Enola Holmes 2: Directed by Harry Bradbeer. With Millie Bobby Brown, Henry Cavill, David Thewlis, Louis Partridge. Now a detective-for-hire, Enola Holmes takes on her first official case to find a missing girl as the sparks of a dangerous conspiracy ignite a mystery that requires the help of friends – and Sherlock himself – to unravel. As good as the first one in some ways and much better in many others, Millie Bobby Brown is firmly capable of being the lead in any film in my humble opinion. The mystery of this story is much less royal, but the much...

The Disorderly Orderly: Directed by Frank Tashlin. With Jerry Lewis, Glenda Farrell, Susan Oliver, Everett Sloane. Medical student Jerome Littlefield works as an orderly at a private clinic where he creates havoc due to his ineptitude. Not a good film, not by any stretch of the imagination, but I did get to see an older Glenda Farell doing her thing. My only other experience with her acting was from about 25 years before this film, so her performance here is much more muted and subtle than I was expecting. Guess you can only keep that classic Farrell energy up for...

The Replacement Killers: Directed by Antoine Fuqua. With Chow Yun-Fat, Mira Sorvino, Michael Rooker, Kenneth Tsang. A troubled hitman seeks aid from a forger to help him get papers to China. However, the drug lord has hired replacements to finish the job, and kill the hitman. Unbelievably full of cool things, circa 1998: leather trench coats, small caliber guns, slow motion, euro techno, and a hit man on the run for refusing to kill a cop with a family. It’s a little more convoluted than that, but as far as “assassin on the run” movies go, this is a good...

Alien from L.A.: Directed by Albert Pyun. With Kathy Ireland, William R. Moses, Richard Haines, Don Michael Paul. A young woman with a childish voice travels to Africa looking for her missing archaeologist father, and stumbles into a strange subterranean civilization. An absolutely fantastical adventure of a pitifully ugly and awkward young woman who falls down a bottomless pit to the center of the earth to save her father, who has also fallen down that same stupid pit. Playing this disgusting looking girl with big glasses, terrible hair, and revolting eyebrows is Kathy Ireland, and actress that would go on...

The Night Before: Directed by Jonathan Levine. With Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Seth Rogen, Anthony Mackie, Jillian Bell. On Christmas Eve, three lifelong friends spend the night in New York City looking for the Holy Grail of Christmas parties. Such a fun film, filled with drugs and a ton of really inappropriate but totally hilarious situations, all wrapped up with a great Christmas message. This isn’t my first time watching the film, but I got it for free because Sony really likes me. Also, I bought enough movies to get it as a rewards, but I’d like to think they’re huge fans...